


Ice Blue

by hondansadeensommar



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Human Trafficking, M/M, Supernatural Elements, mentions of parental death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-09-22 08:07:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 18,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9595037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hondansadeensommar/pseuds/hondansadeensommar
Summary: Ice blue eyes met his own brown.  The man was pale, with a thin, pointed face and hair so blond it almost looked white.  Changkyun could just barely make out the tips of his fangs pressing lightly into his full bottom lip.  But he wasn’t given much time to think about the man’s appearance, before the vampire had wrapped an arm around his waist.  “Hold onto me.”





	1. Hold Onto Me

Changkyun winced as someone opened the door of his small room, bathing him in the bright fluorescent light of the hallway for the first time in what felt like days.  The light stung at his eyes, mostly because his little cell had been almost pitch black the entire time he had been there.  There had been no visits to bring him food, although someone had brought him a couple of bottles of water at some point during his imprisonment.  Changkyun hadn’t even finished the first bottle, trying to save as much as he could because he hadn’t been sure he would get any more.  But the man standing in the doorway didn’t seem to care about any of that, as he kicked at the edge of the mattress Changkyun had been using.  “Get up.”

His legs were weak as Changkyun followed the instructions, stumbling slightly as the tall, pale man grabbed him by the elbow and practically dragged him out of the room.  Changkyun could see the man’s fangs as he smiled widely, gripping Changkyun’s arm a bit tighter and leaning in to smell his neck.  “It’s a shame you’re for sale tonight… I’d love to have you for myself…”

Changkyun winced as he felt the man’s fangs dragging across his skin.  He wasn’t sure how he’d gotten himself into this situation; all he’d been looking for was a place to crash for a few nights after moving to a new city.  Changkyun had just wanted to escape the memories contained within the small house his family had rented in their hometown, knowing that being surrounded by constant reminders of his parents wouldn’t help him deal with their unexpected deaths.  Even after a month, their presence still lingered painfully, and Changkyun had been desperate to try and find somewhere, anywhere else to live.  But he’d chosen the wrong ad to respond to, and now Changkyun seriously regretted accepting the coffee the young man with kind eyes had offered him upon meeting him at the little café.  Changkyun had just wanted to see the little apartment he’d been promised - not this.  Anything but this.

“What do you think you’re doing?”  Changkyun was pulled from his thoughts at the sound of an angry voice addressing the vampire that was currently holding him captive, who quickly pulled away from his neck.  “They’re waiting for him upstairs.  Get moving.”

Changkyun wanted to run, but he knew that attempting to escape would only make things worse; he was surrounded by vampires, and the hand on his arm was painfully tight as he was led up a flight of stairs and down a narrow hallway.  Another vampire grabbed his left arm, quickly scrawling a number across his forearm in bright red ink before he was pushed through a thick black curtain.  Changkyun stumbled as he was forced out onto a small stage, blinded by bright lights.

“Lot number 250… a virgin feeder.  22 years old, type O positive, free of all diseases.  The bidding will commence at 25.”

Changkyun was confused by everything that was going on; he didn’t know how the mysterious voice knew his age, or his blood type.  He also didn’t understand what the numbers meant, or why he was being called a “virgin feeder.”  All he really understood was that he was being auctioned off to the highest bidder, and Changkyun wasn’t even sure what the bidders in the room wanted him _for_.

“SOLD!”  Changkyun was snapped out of his reverie by the mysterious voice’s declaration, and he was quickly ushered off the stage and into a different room.  

There were at least a dozen other people sitting in the room, and Changkyun could see the silver shackles around their ankles and the numbers written on their forearms that matched his own.  He was quickly ushered to an empty seat, and his captor bound his own feet to the floor so that he wouldn’t be able to get away.  “Put your arm out.”  Changkyun winced again as the vampire grabbed his left arm, turning it so that his number was facing up and placing it out on the small table in front of his seat.  “You’ll wait here until you’re paid for.”

Changkyun felt sick as he sat there, staring silently down at the number on his arm for what felt like ages.  He was lightheaded, but Changkyun did his best not to let it show.  Eventually, a pale, cold hand gripped his wrist, clearly checking his pulse before a male voice spoke up.  “If you’re going to sell them as feeders, you need to be taking proper care of them.  He’s too weak to feed from like this.”

“You didn’t have to buy him.”  

Changkyun closed his eyes, afraid to look up at the face of the man that had apparently chosen to pay money for the chance to use him as a living blood bank.  Still, he could hear the anger in the man’s voice when he spoke again.  “I expected better treatment, given what you charge…”  There was a brief moment of silence, as the cold hand moved back to pull down Changkyun’s left sleeve, using it to cover the red ink.  “Remove the shackles.”

“You don’t have to take him, if you’re unhappy with the purchase.”

“Just unlock the chains, before I change my mind.”  Changkyun didn’t move, even as he felt someone removing the metal cuffs from around his ankles.  He was terrified, unsure of what to expect now that he’d apparently been purchased by an unknown vampire.  The cold hand took his arm, although it was significantly less harsh than the man that had pulled him from the small cell he’d been kept in.

Changkyun didn’t dare to look at the man who had purchased him as he was guided through the building, unsure of what was going on.  Finally, the man leading him stopped, turning around and stepping closer to Changkyun - uncomfortably close.  “Look at me.”  Changkyun was slow to follow the instruction, even as he felt the man place a cold hand under his chin to speed him up.

Ice blue eyes met his own brown.  The man was pale, with a thin, pointed face and hair so blond it almost looked white.  Changkyun could just barely make out the tips of his fangs pressing lightly into his full bottom lip.  But he wasn’t given much time to think about the man’s appearance, before the vampire had wrapped an arm around his waist.  “Hold onto me.”


	2. Awake

Changkyun wasn’t sure what had happened; he remembered standing with a vampire in a small hallway, and the vampire telling him to hold on.  But waking up in a comfortable bed, wearing different clothes and smelling of soap was disorienting and Changkyun wasn’t sure exactly what had happened. 

“You’re awake.”  Changkyun turned towards the voice, immediately trying to sit up and move away from the blond vampire that had been with him earlier.  But he was too weak, and he found himself collapsing back against the pillow that had been under his head.  The vampire seemed to sense that he was terrified, as he pushed his chair back slightly and held his hands up so that Changkyun could see them.  “Relax.  I’m not going to hurt you.”

“Wh-who are you?” Changkyun asked, watching as the vampire stood up and moved over to a small table next to his bed.  The man carefully opened a bottle of water, holding it to Changkyun’s lips so that he could drink.  He was thankful for the cool liquid that slid down his throat for a moment, until the vampire pulled the bottle back slowly.

“My name is Shin Hoseok.  And before you ask, yes, I am a vampire.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, letting his eyes close again.  Somehow, he felt more comfortable knowing that the man was being honest with him.  “I know that you’re exhausted, but you need to eat something before you sleep again.”

The comfortable feeling was short-lived.  Changkyun could feel his heart racing as he began to remember more about how he’d gotten there.  The word _feeder_ came to mind suddenly, and Changkyun felt sick at the thought.  “What are you going to do with me?”

Hoseok smiled, shaking his head.  “I’m not going to kill you, if that’s what you’re worried about,” the vampire replied.  “For now, my plan is to feed you and make sure that you’re healthy.  Once you’ve gotten your strength back, we can discuss why you’re here.”  Changkyun was surprised at how gentle the vampire was as he put a hand behind Changkyun’s back, easily lifting him up so that Hoseok could place another pillow behind his back and prop him up a bit.  “I hope you like seaweed soup… Kihyun- _ah_ said that it would be good for you.”

“Kihyun?” Changkyun asked, as the vampire handed him a cloth napkin.  It wasn’t until he went to place the cloth over his chest that he realized someone had placed an IV line in the back of his left hand.

“A friend of mine… he’s a human, like you,” Hoseok replied, picking up the bowl and a spoon.  “Don’t worry… he’s the one that made the soup.  At this point, it’s been so long since I’ve had to eat real food, I’d likely burn down the entire building if I tried.”

Changkyun wasn’t sure if it was a joke or not, so he chose not to laugh.  “Is he the one that did this?” he asked, holding up his hand to show the man the IV drip.

“He works as a nurse,” the vampire replied, nodding.  “Kihyun- _ah_ checked you out when we first arrived, after you collapsed on the way here… you’re a bit dehydrated, and somewhat malnourished, but he’s confident that you’ll be better soon.  But you need to eat.”

Being fed soup by a vampire was confusing, but Changkyun didn’t really know how to deal with the situation in that moment.  Given how weak he had been when he’d tried to sit up on his own, Changkyun really wasn’t sure that he would be able to feed himself if he did try to argue.  But the soup was good, and Changkyun ate half the bowl in silence, before refusing the spoon because he wasn’t sure that he could stomach any more.  “I’m sorry…”

The vampire shook his head, moving to put the bowl back onto the table next to Changkyun’s bed.  “Don’t be.  I don’t want you to make yourself sick.”  Changkyun watched as the vampire sat back, crossing his legs.  “I’m sure you have questions…?”

There were a million questions floating through Changkyun’s head, but there was only one that he could voice at that moment.  “I know that I was auctioned off… but why did you buy me?”

Hoseok smirked slightly.  “Because you looked too innocent to be a feeder, and I wanted to make sure that you were protected,” the vampire replied, as if his words explained everything.

“What is a feeder?”

“Feeders are humans that agree to give up their blood so that a vampire, like me, can live without having to kill,” Hoseok replied.  “It’s illegal to force a human into a feeding relationship, but unfortunately that’s what everyone else in that room last night intended to do to all of you.  That’s typically the case with black market auctions.  I’m assuming that you weren’t there willingly?”  Changkyun shook his head, letting his eyes close again.  “Is there anyone that would be looking for you?  Anyone I should contact?”

“I don’t have anyone.”  Changkyun’s voice broke as he replied, but he couldn’t seem to produce any tears.  

Still, the vampire seemed to understand.  “I’m sorry… I take it that this has been a recent change…”

“I moved back to Korea six weeks ago.  My parents were killed in a car accident two weeks later,” Changkyun replied softly.

“I’m terribly sorry… no one should have to lose a parent so young.”  Changkyun didn’t respond.  “When you’re well again, I’ll take you home.  If that’s what you want.”

“I don’t think I can ever repay you…” Changkyun began.

“I don’t expect repayment.  When you’ve lived as long as I have, money is hardly an issue.”  There was a brief silence.  “All I ask is that you allow me to mark you, before you leave.  It’s a protection - if they believe that you are taken, other vampires won’t attempt to feed from you.”

Changkyun thought for a moment.  “Will it hurt?”

“I can stop you from feeling the pain, at least while I’m biting you,” Hoseok replied.  “We vampires have ways of tricking the mind… of making humans believe things that aren’t real.  I choose not to use them, except to protect those I care about.  If the pain is something you fear, it doesn’t have to be part of the process.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, contemplating what the older man was saying.  “You should rest now.  Kihyun will come check on you again in a little while, but I won’t be back until tomorrow night.”

“Do you really sleep in a coffin?”  

Changkyun wasn’t sure where the question came from, but Hoseok laughed slightly at it, as if Changkyun’s question was amusing.  “Not exactly… some do, but I find that to be a bit overkill.  I have a bed, in a room with the windows covered.  It’s not exactly the safest way to rest as a vampire, but I choose to only allow those I trust into my apartment.  Now rest… Kihyun may just try to kill me again if he finds I’m not taking proper care of our patient.”

When Changkyun woke up again, the room was dark except for a small lamp on the bedside table.  There was a different man sitting in the chair Hoseok had occupied previously.  He was smaller than the vampire, with a rounder face and smaller eyes.  Changkyun could also see that his hair was dyed an unnatural pink color as he read a book in a language Changkyun didn’t recognize.

“Kihyun- _ssi_?”

The man looked up, smiling at him.  “Welcome back to the land of the living,” Kihyun commented, closing his book and setting it aside.  “I was starting to wonder if you were going to wake up before Hoseok- _hyung_ … how are you feeling?”

“Better, but still pretty tired,” Changkyun replied.  “I do need to use the bathroom, though…”

“That’s good.”  Changkyun couldn’t help raising an eyebrow at the man’s response to his need to pee.  “You’re probably still dehydrated, but if your kidneys are creating urine that’s a good sign.”  Changkyun nodded, realizing what the man meant.  “Do you think you can walk to the bathroom?”

Changkyun nodded, pushing back the blankets that had been tucked around his body and slowly starting to push himself into a seated position.  Kihyun took his right arm and helped him when he began to shake from the effort.  “Take your time… you’ve been out for a while, and you’re going to be weak.”

“How long has it been?” Changkyun asked.

“It’s Sunday afternoon,” Kihyun replied.  “Hoseok brought you home late Friday night, and you didn’t wake up at all until early this morning.”  Changkyun couldn’t help being confused; it had been Tuesday night when he’d met the man with kind eyes in the coffee shop.  The bastard that had done all of this to him, by putting something in his latte.

Changkyun was thankful for Kihyun’s help as he stood up slowly, letting too much of his weight rest against the nurse’s shoulders as the other man helped him cross the room and into the small attached bathroom, dragging the IV behind the two instead of detaching the line.  “I can take it from here,” Changkyun commented once they were inside, leaning his weight against the sink.

“Yeah… I don’t believe you,” Kihyun replied.  “Look, I’m a nurse… I’ve already cleaned you up since you’ve gotten here, so it isn’t like you have anything to hide.  Besides, I’m pretty sure neither one of us wants to deal with what will happen if you potentially fall while you’re in here.”  Changkyun sighed, nodding slightly and letting Kihyun help him the last few steps to the toilet.  He was thankful when the other man at least turned around once he was safely seated to give him at least that much privacy.

By the time they made it back to the bed, Changkyun was exhausted.  “Thanks…”

“I’m going to go reheat the soup.  You need to eat, too, and try to drink some more water,” Kihyun replied.

“Kihyun- _ssi_ … do you…?”  Changkyun paused, unsure of how to ask the question.

Kihyun immediately seemed to understand what Changkyun was trying to ask.  “You want to know if I allow Hoseok- _hyung_ to feed from me?”  Changkyun nodded slowly.  “I do, sometimes.  But he has other friends that help as well… feeding can be a draining task, and Hoseok- _hyung_ doesn’t want to risk hurting those he cares about.”

“Does it hurt?”  Changkyun wasn’t sure what brought him to ask the question in the first place.  He hadn’t voluntarily chosen to be in Hoseok’s apartment, and Changkyun wasn’t even sure that he _wanted_ to be a feeder.  Yet he couldn’t help being curious about the situation he was in, even if he did have the benefit of being able to say no.

Kihyun seemed to think for a moment, as if he wasn’t sure what to tell Changkyun.  “It’s not exactly pleasant… but it isn’t the most painful thing I’ve ever done,” Kihyun finally replied.  “You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, though.  Hoseok won’t force you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, closing his eyes.

“He seems like a good person…”

“He really is,” Kihyun replied.  “Hoseok- _hyung_ never wanted to be a vampire, and he refuses to hurt anyone if he can avoid it.”  Changkyun felt the man gently squeezing his hand.  “Let me go get you something to eat, okay?  We need to make sure you get your strength back.”


	3. Trust

Changkyun watched as Kihyun placed a bandage over the spot where he’d removed the IV line.  “You still need to take it easy for a few days… Hoseok- _hyung_ said for me to tell you that you’re welcome to wander around the apartment while he’s sleeping, but he’s asked that you don’t leave without telling him and that you don’t open his bedroom door during the day.  I stocked the fridge with some food for you to eat while you’re here, and Hoseok- _hyung_ said he would take you wherever you want in a few days, once you’re well enough to take care of yourself.”

“Those are his only rules?” Changkyun asked, slightly confused.  He’d expected a long list of things he could and couldn’t do around the apartment as he recovered.

Kihyun just shrugged as he finished cleaning up the trash from the IV line.  “He trusts you.”

“He doesn’t even know me…” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “I could be some kind of psychopath, for all he knows…”

“There are a lot of things you don’t know about Hoseok- _hyung_ , Changkyun- _ssi_.  He hates being a vampire, but he can’t bring himself to end his own life,” Kihyun replied.

Changkyun couldn’t help feeling guilty at the man’s explanation, nodding slowly.  “So… he’s secretly hoping that I _will_ open the door, so that he doesn’t have to do it himself.”

“Maybe,” Kihyun replied, shrugging.  “I don’t even attempt to understand the way Hoseok- _hyung_ ’s mind works - and he doesn’t explain things, unless he _wants_ you to understand what’s going on in his head.”  Changkyun nodded slowly.  “Just… don’t make any assumptions about him, okay?  He really is a good person.”

It was awkward being left alone after that, knowing that there was a vampire sleeping somewhere in the apartment.  Changkyun hadn’t ventured beyond the small bedroom he’d been using, mostly because he hadn’t had the strength to make it any further than the bathroom.  But after spending some time looking out the small window to try and figure out where he was, he couldn’t help being curious about the rest of the apartment and how it compared to the simple, modern furnishings in the small room.

The apartment wasn’t huge; the bedroom was near the far end of a short hall, with what appeared to be another guest bedroom that seemingly doubled as an office as well as another bathroom through the two open doors he could see.  The last door, directly next to the one Changkyun had just exited, was closed and he assumed that it belonged to Hoseok.  The hall itself lead out into a living room, with a kitchen and a small dining area on the far side.  Changkyun could see the front door, but he didn’t approach it - Kihyun’s instructions were still fresh in his mind, and something made Changkyun _want_ to follow the vampire’s simple rules.  At the very least, he found himself not wanting to do anything that might upset his host.

Changkyun wasn’t sure how long he sat on the couch in the vampire’s living room, watching the sun set through the windows.  He wasn’t really paying attention, until he heard the sound of someone clearing his throat behind him.

Hoseok sat down at the far end of the couch as Changkyun watched him, smiling.  “You look much better tonight,” Hoseok commented, keeping his distance from Changkyun.  “How are you feeling?”

“Confused,” Changkyun admitted, pulling his legs up onto the couch so that he was sitting with his legs crossed.  “I’m… I’m not sure how I feel about being here…”

The vampire was silent for a moment, before he spoke again.  “As soon as you’re feeling well enough to take care of yourself, you’ll be free to go.”

Changkyun shook his head.  “That isn’t… I know that’s what I _should_ want.  But… I don’t think I do.”

Hoseok leaned forward, letting his elbows rest on his knees, without looking at Changkyun.  “What is it that you _do_ want?”

“You couldn’t give me what I truly want,” Changkyun replied softly.

“I see.”  Changkyun was surprised when the man slowly moved closer, putting a hand on his knee.  “I can’t give your parents back to you.  And I won’t kill you, either.  But if you need time to put yourself back together again, I can offer you a safe place to do that.”

Changkyun nodded, turning to look out the window again.  “I don’t have any idea where I am…”

“Gwangjin-gu… I’ve found that Seoul allows me to live as a vampire without having to worry about risking being discovered,” Hoseok replied.  “You said you’d only been here for six weeks?”

“My parents moved to Jingwan-dong a few months ago… I followed them when I finished college in the States, with the intention of starting graduate school in a few months,” Changkyun replied.  “I was just starting to get settled, looking for jobs… and then everything fell apart.”

There were tears stinging at Changkyun’s eyes as he spoke.  Everything was still fresh in his mind; he’d been in the car, laughing and talking with his parents about some ridiculous mistake one of his father’s students had made during a chemistry lab experiment.  It had all happened so suddenly, and Changkyun still couldn’t understand how he’d been able to walk away mostly unscathed.

“You don’t have to tell me anything that makes you uncomfortable or upset,” Hoseok replied softly.  Changkyun nodded, closing his eyes.  “Can I give you a hug, Changkyun- _ah_?”

Changkyun nodded slowly, letting the vampire move a bit closer and pull him into a surprisingly warm embrace.  He let his head rest against Hoseok’s shoulder, closing his eyes and giving into the tears that were already starting to spill across his cheeks.  “I’m sorry…”

“Please don’t apologize… if you need to cry, just let it out.”  Changkyun couldn’t help the sobs that escaped at Hoseok’s words, unable to control his emotions.  He wasn’t sure how long he stayed there, crying against the vampire’s neck and clinging onto his shirt.  Hoseok was gently rubbing his back as he cried until Changkyun collapsed against the vampire’s chest, too weak to hold himself up.  “Let me take you back to bed… I’ll bring you something to eat, and you can rest…”

“No… no, I’m okay,” Changkyun replied, unable to lift himself away from the vampire’s chest.  It was clear that Hoseok wasn’t convinced by his words, and the vampire was quick to move his body into a more convenient position and pick him up, carrying him slowly back towards the small bedroom.  Changkyun didn’t let go of Hoseok’s shirt, even once the vampire had placed him back on the bed.  “Please don’t leave me…”

“Shh… I’m just going to go to the kitchen.  You need to eat, and you need more water.  I promise I’ll come right back.”  Changkyun finally let go, nodding slowly and closing his eyes as the vampire left the room.

Changkyun couldn’t help feeling guilty as he realized what he’d just done - that he’d broken down in front of the vampire, exposing the most vulnerable part of himself to someone he hardly even knew.  Hoseok had already done so much for him, and yet he found himself becoming even more of a burden.

Changkyun didn’t move as he heard Hoseok coming back into the room.  He didn’t want to look at the man, even as he heard Hoseok setting something down on the small table next to his bed.  “Sit up for me…”  Changkyun did as he was told, letting the vampire help him adjust the pillows so that he was sitting up in the bed.  But he didn’t move to take anything from the tray, instead choosing to study his host’s face in silence for a moment.  He knew that it was strange, given the look of confusion on Hoseok’s face.  “Is something wrong?”

“Why are you being so nice to me?” Changkyun asked softly, not looking away from the man.

Hoseok smiled softly, shaking his head.  “Because you remind me of myself.  When I was young.  When I was still human.”  Changkyun closed his eyes, finally looking away from the man.  That wasn’t the answer he’d expected, and he really wasn’t sure how to respond to that.  “You should try and eat now… and drink the water I brought.  I’ll leave you alone, if you’d like…”

“No.”  Changkyun almost surprised himself with how quickly he reacted, reaching out to put his hand on the vampire’s wrist as Hoseok began to leave.  “Please… I don’t want to be alone right now.”

The vampire nodded, smiling.  “I’ll have to leave in a little while, at least long enough to go feed myself.  But I can stay until you fall asleep.”

Changkyun took the bowl Hoseok handed him, starting to eat the reheated soup Kihyun had left behind for him.  “Kihyun- _ssi_ said that you sometimes feed from him…”

“That’s true,” Hoseok replied.  “I have several friends that help me, and Kihyun- _ah_ is one of them.”

“How many others are there?”

Hoseok smiled slightly.  “Four.  But I also use blood banks, so that I don’t risk abusing their friendship.  Especially since they’re also friends with Minhyuk…”

Changkyun raised an eyebrow at the mention of another name he didn’t recognize.  “Minhyuk?”

“He’s also a vampire… the only person I’ve ever turned,” Hoseok replied.  “If you want to ask questions, you have to keep eating.”  

Changkyun hadn’t realized that he’d stopped, but he was quick to pick the spoon back up and swallow another spoonful of the warm liquid before asking another question.  “Why did you turn him?”

There was a brief moment when Changkyun could see a flash of pain cross Hoseok’s face, before the vampire masked it.  “I didn’t always have friends who were willing to help me feed… I used to be a monster.  I met Minhyuk by accident - he stumbled upon me while I was feeding from someone else, but instead of running away he begged me to let the man live.  Volunteered to give up his own life, to give me his blood, if I would just leave the other man alone.”

The vampire paused for a moment, taking a deep breath.  “He introduced me to the idea of using a willing human to feed from, and he allowed me to feed from him for months.  Minhyuk was the first friend I made after I was turned, even though it had been over a hundred years.  But then his blood changed… and shortly after, he went to a doctor and was told that it was leukemia.  That he was dying.”

“I’m sorry…” Changkyun began.

Hoseok shook his head.  “Minhyuk asked me to turn him.  I had seen so much death in that time - I’d already lost everyone that I cared for, and I was desperate for someone that wouldn’t leave me behind, like everyone else.  So I agreed.”

Changkyun had stopped eating again, but Hoseok didn’t say anything as he finished his explanation.  “But he doesn’t live here?”

“We were roommates for a while… but two vampires living together can get complicated, and eventually we decided to live separately, in different parts of the city, so that our hunting would be less obvious.  Eat.”  The food was starting to get cold, but Changkyun was quick to finish the bowl so that Hoseok would stop worrying about his eating.  “Can I ask _you_ a question?”

Changkyun looked down at the bowl in his lap.  “I’m not all that interesting…”

“You said earlier that you don’t think you want to leave.  Does that mean you want to stay?”

“I don’t know…” Changkyun replied softly, shaking his head.  “I don’t know where I would go…”  Changkyun was surprised when the vampire carefully took the bowl away from him, before placing the glass of water in his hands.  Changkyun took a sip, knowing that he needed to drink if he didn’t want to end up back on the IV Kihyun had just removed.

The vampire moved his chair a bit closer, putting his hand gently on Changkyun’s knee.  “There’s no pressure… you don’t even have to make a decision yet, if you aren’t ready.  You’re still recovering…”

“I’m sorry that I’m being such a burden.”

“You’re _not_.”  Changkyun looked up at the vampire’s words.  “Don’t feel like you have to apologize, or pay me back, or anything like that.  I chose to help you, without expecting anything in return, because I couldn’t stand the thought of anyone hurting you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I don't know why I posted this story. I don't quite know where it's headed, or why I've suddenly become so obsessed with writing this particular pairing (because let's get real, if you've read In Bloom, you know it ended up turning into WonKyun without me even realizing it was happening). But it's happening now, so I suppose I'll figure it out as I go.
> 
> Sorry if this makes no sense - it's been a weird week over here.


	4. Volunteer

Changkyun stared out the window, waiting silently for Hoseok to wake up and come looking for him as he’d done every evening since Changkyun had finally been able to get up and move around on his own.  It had been three days since Kihyun had removed the IV, and while Changkyun knew that he really didn’t _need_ their assistance any more, he couldn’t bring himself to ask Hoseok or Kihyun to take him back to the apartment he’d been sharing with his parents.  He just wasn’t ready to face everything again, even though he knew that his neighbors were likely starting to notice his absence.

But there was something more pressing on Changkyun’s mind - something he’d been thinking about for a while, ever since the idea had first been mentioned to him, when he was still too weak to actually act on it.  Changkyun had thought through it all, and decided that he would offer to feed Hoseok at least once before he left the apartment.  He knew that he couldn’t stay forever, but Changkyun could at least try to repay the vampire’s kindness by giving him the only thing Changkyun had to offer.

It wasn’t until he felt a hand on his shoulder that Changkyun realized he’d been so lost in his own thoughts that he hadn’t heard the man enter his room.  “Is everything okay?”  Changkyun felt his heart racing, and as he turned towards the vampire he could tell that Hoseok knew something was going on.  He wasn’t sure, but Changkyun suspected that the man could hear his heart beating through his chest.  “Changkyun- _ah_ … if something is bothering you, you can tell me.  It isn’t going to hurt my feelings if you’re ready to leave…”

“I want you to bite me.”  The words were rushed, to the point that Changkyun himself wasn’t completely sure what he’d said as Hoseok pulled back slightly, clearly confused.  He took a deep breath, before continuing more slowly.  “I want to try to feed you at least once, before I leave.”

Hoseok watched him carefully, studying his face before he responded.  “You know that you don’t have to do that…” Hoseok began.

“I know,” Changkyun replied, nodding slowly.  “I’m volunteering.”

There was a brief moment of silence, as Changkyun watched Hoseok contemplating his next move.  He closed his eyes as the vampire reached out to touch his face, leaning into Hoseok’s touch.  There were butterflies in his stomach, although Changkyun wrote it off as nerves due to the fact that he was about to allow a vampire to bite him.  

“You’re sure about this?”  Changkyun nodded, as the man gently moved his hand down the side of his neck, letting his fingertips graze over the spot where Changkyun knew his pulse would be most obvious.  “You’re nervous… your heart is racing…”

“I don’t know what to expect,” Changkyun admitted, finally opening his eyes.  He needed to prove to Hoseok that he was serious.  “But I’ve been thinking about it for days… and I _want_ to do this.  At least once.”

“Are you ready?  Really?”  Changkyun nodded.  “Okay… lay down with me.”

Changkyun raised an eyebrow, confused.  “Why?”

Hoseok smiled, gently pushing the hair out of his face.  “Because you’ll likely feel weak when I’m finished, and I don’t want you to get hurt,” the vampire replied.  “I won’t take enough to hurt you, but some people can get lightheaded.”

Changkyun let the vampire lead him over to the bed, laying down with his head on the pillow and watching as Hoseok stretched out next to him.  Something about laying down on the bed and having the vampire close to him was relaxing, even though Changkyun knew it really shouldn’t have been given the situation.  Still, he found himself taking a deep breath  and allowing himself to calm down as Hoseok adjusted their position slightly, until he had easy access to Changkyun’s neck.  “Close your eyes.”

“What are you going to do?” Changkyun asked, feeling his heart rate begin to rise again at the request.

“I’m going to mask the pain… make it so that you don’t even know what’s happening, until it’s over…”

“No,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “No… I want to know what’s going on.”  Hoseok raised an eyebrow, seemingly confused.  “I was drugged… that’s how they got me to the auction that night.  The idea of not knowing what’s going on scares me more than the idea it might hurt.”

Hoseok nodded slowly, carefully brushing Changkyun’s hair out of his face.  “I understand.  You’re okay, knowing that it’s going to hurt?”  Changkyun nodded, closing his eyes.  He was surprised at how gentle Hoseok was, as the vampire carefully moved him again, into a comfortable position that exposed his neck.  Changkyun shivered slightly as he felt Hoseok press a soft kiss against his neck, before he felt the vampire’s fangs sink into his skin.

Even though he’d known that it would hurt, Changkyun couldn’t help being surprised by the pain that bloomed from his neck as Hoseok drew blood.  He whimpered softly, but Changkyun made himself stay still even as he felt his blood leaving his body.  It was a strange sensation, but once the initial pain went away Changkyun didn’t really find it all that unpleasant.  Eventually, the vampire pulled back, gently removing his fangs from Changkyun’s neck and carefully pressed his lips against the two small puncture marks left behind.

Changkyun opened his eyes, surprised to see just how pink the vampire’s cheeks had become from feeding.  He’d never seen Hoseok just after he’d eaten before, but Changkyun couldn’t help thinking that the man looked almost human - at least until he smiled, and Changkyun could see his own blood staining the ends of the vampire’s fangs.  That sight was enough to make his stomach churn slightly, although it went away quickly once Hoseok moved back slightly and helped him into a more comfortable position.

“How do you feel?” Hoseok asked softly, stroking the side of Changkyun’s face gently.  

“I’m okay,” Changkyun replied, reaching up towards his neck and letting his fingers trace over the spot where he’d been bitten, expecting to feel blood still coming through his skin.  But instead, there were just two small, slightly raised spots under his fingertips and when he pulled his hand back there was no sign of blood.  “How…?”

“If I don’t keep drawing out blood, my saliva will make the wounds heal over almost instantly,” Hoseok explained.  Changkyun nodded, starting to sit up until he felt his head swimming slightly.  He was surprised when he felt Hoseok quickly putting a hand on his back, holding him up. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

Changkyun shook his head slowly, letting his eyes close.  “Just a little lightheaded, like you said,” Changkyun replied.  “Maybe I should stay here for a while…”

“Do you want me to get you some water?  Or maybe something to eat?” the vampire asked.

“Water would be good,” Changkyun replied, laying back down and reaching up to push the hair out of his face.  “I’m sorry… I guess I should have had more water today…”

“I probably should have checked to make sure you were hydrated before I did that… you look a little pale…”  Changkyun could see the look of concern on the vampire’s face as Hoseok started to get up.  “I’ll be right back, okay?  Just relax for a few minutes.”

Changkyun felt something cool and wet against his forehead, which made him open his eyes.  He hadn’t even realized that he’d started to fall asleep until he saw the vampire smiling down at him.  “Do you think you can sit up?  I brought you some water, and I found some cookies Kihyun bought that I thought might help.”  Changkyun nodded, letting the man help him sit up and put the pillows behind him again to help him stay sitting up.  His head was still spinning a bit, even as Hoseok moved the cold cloth to the back of his neck instead.  “Feeling okay?”

“Still just a little lightheaded,” Changkyun replied.  He watched as the vampire nodded while opening a bottle of water.  Changkyun took the bottle carefully, surprised at the way his hand shook as he lifted it to his lips and took a couple of slow sips.  “Next time, maybe I should eat before we do that…”

Hoseok raised an eyebrow at Changkyun’s words.  “There’s going to be a next time?”

“It wasn’t that bad,” Changkyun replied.  “I wouldn’t be opposed to feeding you again, if you wanted.”

The vampire laughed slightly, shaking his head.  “Maybe we should wait until we see how long it takes for you to recover from this one before you start volunteering to feed me on a regular basis.”  

Changkyun nodded, continuing to sip from the bottle of water.  Finally, he moved the bottle down so that he was holding it in his lap.  “ _Hyung_ … can I ask you a question?”

“As long as you understand that I may choose not to answer… there are some things I’m not comfortable discussing right now,” the vampire replied.

“I just… why did you kiss my neck, before you bit me?”

There was a moment of silence, before the vampire responded to his question.  “I’m not going to lie to you, Changkyun- _ah_.  I’ve found myself growing fond of your presence here… and growing fond of _you_.”  Changkyun felt his stomach clenching at the man’s words, and it was clear that Hoseok could see something in his facial expression that concerned him.  “I’ll understand if you aren’t comfortable staying here, knowing that I’m developing feelings for you.  I can have Kihyun help you get home tomorrow…”

Changkyun was quick to shake his head as the vampire stood up, as if he was going to leave the room.  “It doesn’t bother me, _hyung_ ,” he replied, reaching out to stop Hoseok from walking away.  “I’m just surprised… I wasn’t expecting any kind of confession.”  Changkyun could see the vampire’s relief as Hoseok turned back towards him, and he smiled to reassure Hoseok that he was okay.  “The truth is, I’m happier here than I have been for a long time.  And maybe it’s just because I’m running away from everything that’s gone wrong in the past couple of months, but I don’t want to leave.”

“And you’re welcome here, for as long as you’re comfortable staying,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun watched as the vampire sat down next to him again.  “Can I kiss you, Changkyun- _ah_?”

“I think I’d like that,” Changkyun replied.

Changkyun watched as Hoseok moved closer, reaching up to gently cup Changkyun’s face with one hand.  He leaned into the touch, smiling slightly as Hoseok reached up with his other hand and pushed the hair out of his face.  “You’re so beautiful, Changkyun- _ah_ …”  The vampire’s skin warmed slightly as he continued to stroke Changkyun’s cheek, before leaning in so that he was pressing their foreheads together.

Hoseok’s lips were soft, and still warm from feeding a few minutes earlier.  Changkyun felt a little strange when he realized that they were like that because of _him_ \- because it was _his_ blood currently causing Hoseok to seem so alive - but he was quick to push that thought out of his head as the vampire deepened the kiss and gently coaxed Changkyun’s lips apart so that the vampire could go exploring with his tongue.

By the time Hoseok pulled away from the kiss, Changkyun was almost dizzy from a lack of oxygen.  He closed his eyes, leaning back against the pillow.  “I’m not sure if I’m seeing stars because it was so good, or because I ran out of oxygen…” Changkyun began.

“I’m sorry - I was a little _too_ into it…”  Changkyun smiled as Hoseok pressed another soft kiss against his forehead.  “You should probably try to rest now.  Maybe eat something?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am officially theatre trash... I was SO tempted to title this chapter "Feed Me Seymour" or "Eat Me" (because I'm directing Alice in Wonderland right now, and I'm in full-on tech mode 99% of the time).
> 
> So yeah... I hope you all enjoy!


	5. Memories

Changkyun felt strange being outside Hoseok’s apartment; he’d been hesitant to leave, but when Hoseok had told him that it was the 20th, he knew he had no choice but to go take care of his parents’s apartment.  So he’d told Hoseok the previous evening that he was going out for a few hours, but that he would be back by the time Hoseok woke up for the evening.  He’d still left a note with the address and entrance codes for Hoseok, just in case.

Taking care of the bills had been fairly simple; Changkyun had easily been able to get access to his parents’s bank accounts thanks to his father’s forward-thinking, and there had been multiple life insurance policies that had paid out fairly quickly after the funeral.  Money wasn’t an issue.  But actually dealing with the remnants of their lives was more difficult, and as Changkyun walked into the small apartment he found himself fighting the urge to just break down and sob at the sight of his father’s coat hanging on the hook on the wall.

It had been over a week since he’d been inside the apartment, and it felt even colder and less like a home than it had the first time he’d found himself alone after the funeral.  Changkyun hated the apartment, but he knew that he would have to finish the process of clearing out all of his family’s belongings if he wanted to be able to leave the place for good.  While he’d managed to finish dealing with some of the less personal items in the apartment before he’d been kidnapped, there was still so much more than he could really deal with at that moment.

By the time Changkyun checked the clock in his room, it was already starting to get late and he still had to make his way back across the city to Hoseok’s apartment.  All he’d really managed to do was pack up his backpack and suitcase with the essentials he needed to take with him, and Changkyun felt emotionally drained from the effort.  All he wanted was to get back to Hoseok’s apartment, where he would be able to collapse and go to sleep - after he’d had a chance to curl up with Hoseok for a few minutes and just let everything go.

“Lim Changkyun?”  Changkyun turned quickly as he closed the apartment door, bowing to the elderly neighbor that had addressed him.  While he hadn’t really gotten the chance to get to know anyone in the building before his parents had died, there were a few faces he recognized and that recognized him in return.  “I was starting to wonder if something had happened to you… it’s been more than a week since anyone has seen you in the building.”

“I’m sorry, _ahjumma_ … I went to visit a friend, and ended up getting sick,” Changkyun replied.  It was the first thing he could come up with on the spot - how could he explain that he’d been kidnapped by a guy that had drugged his coffee and he’d been sold to a vampire?  It was at least somewhat close to the truth - he _had_ been sick, after everything that had happened to him.

The woman looked concerned.  “You should take better care of yourself, Changkyun- _ah_ ,” she replied.  “Are you coming home now?”

Changkyun shook his head.  “No, _ahjumma_ … I’m actually moving out,” he replied softly.  “I have to be out by the end of the month.  I’ll be picking up the rest of my things tomorrow.”

“I’m sorry… the landlord won’t give you more time?” she asked.

“I haven’t asked,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “I need the pressure of a deadline to finish cleaning everything out.  It isn’t going to do me any good to stay here and continue to focus on the pain of losing my parents.  It’s better if I leave, and now I have a place to stay.”

The older woman nodded again, smiling sadly at him.  “I understand.  You’ve had a difficult few months.  But you won’t be alone?”

“No, _ahjumma_ ,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “I’ll be staying with the friend I mentioned… he has a spare bedroom, and he’s offered it to me until I can get back on my feet.”

“I’m glad… you shouldn’t be alone through all of this,” the woman replied.  “I should get to work on dinner, before Mr. Nam gets upset with me for being out so long.  You’ll stop by before you leave for good?”

Changkyun nodded, forcing a smile.  “Of course, _ahjumma_.  It’ll be a few days before I’m done clearing everything out, but I’ll make sure to tell you before I leave.”

The subway ride back across the city seemed to take even longer than the ride to his former home, and he just wanted to fall asleep on the train.  By the time he was back at Hoseok’s door, he was so tired he couldn’t even remember the passcode he was supposed to use to get into the apartment.  Thankfully it was already dark outside, meaning he didn’t have to feel bad about pressing the doorbell button attached to the lock.

“Changkyun- _ah_?  You don’t have to ring the doorbell…” Hoseok commented, as he opened the door.

“Forgot the code,” Changkyun replied, pulling his suitcase into the apartment behind him as Hoseok stepped out of the way.  “I’m sorry for bothering you…”

“Don’t worry about it.”  Changkyun was surprised when Hoseok took his suitcase.  “You look exhausted…”

“I still need to unpack…” Changkyun began.  He was surprised when Hoseok moved closer to him, wrapping an arm around his waist and leaning in to press a soft kiss against his lips.  “I really just want to go to sleep…”

“So then you should go to sleep,” Hoseok replied.  “You need to take proper care of yourself… and if you’re tired, then you should sleep.”

Changkyun sighed, letting his eyes close as he leaned into the vampire’s embrace.  “I have so much to do…”

“Shh… don’t argue with me on this one.  Let’s put your stuff in your room, and then we can find something for you to eat.”

“What about you, _hyung_?  You need to eat, too…” Changkyun replied, pulling away from the vampire.  “How often do you actually need to eat, anyway?  I know you said it was too often for you to only have one feeder…”

Hoseok sighed, shaking his head.  “Why are you worrying about me right now?  You’re the one that’s been through hell…”

“Please answer me, _hyung_.  If I’m going to be living with you, I need to know…”

Hoseok reached up slowly, reaching up to fix Changkyun’s hair.  “I only have to eat every other night… but I typically need more than I can safely take from a single feeder.  After you went to sleep the other night, I had to get a couple of the blood bags I keep in the fridge to finish up.”

“So you need to eat tonight…” Changkyun began, turning to bare his neck for the vampire.

“My friend Hyungwon is going to be here in a little while.  And I’ve got more than enough blood saved up in the fridge.  I’m not going to take any more from you this week.”  

Changkyun nodded slowly, moving again so that he wouldn’t tempt Hoseok to go against his word.  “Would it bother you if I watched?  I’ve never seen a vampire feed before…”

Hoseok smiled.  “I’m fine with it, but I’ll have to run it by Hyungwon.  He’s a bit shy… and he refuses to let me leave a mark anywhere obvious.  But if he’s okay with it, it’s fine with me.”  Changkyun couldn’t help blushing slightly as his stomach growled; he had been so distracted with everything that was going on, he hadn’t even thought about eating lunch.  “It sounds like you’re hungry, too.  Why don’t you go wash up, and I’ll heat up something Kihyun made…”

“I need to start cooking for myself…” Changkyun began.

“You’ll get the chance to do that soon enough… I think all that’s left is the kimchi stew Kihyun made the last day you were still too weak to care for yourself.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, closing his eyes.  “Go clean up, okay?  Then you can eat, and then sleep.”

“Okay,” Changkyun replied, pulling away from the vampire and making his way back to the bedroom he’d been using.  He hurried to clean himself up, splashing the cool water from the sink on his face and trying to wake himself up a bit before he went back to the kitchen.  Hoseok was still in the process of heating up the stew on the stove, but Changkyun moved to sit at one of the bar stools across the island from the vampire.  “Thank you, _hyung_.”

“It’s no problem,” Hoseok replied, as he poured the stew into a bowl and passed it across the island along with a spoon.  “Besides, I _want_ to take care of you.  It’s nice to have someone to take care of for a change, instead of relying solely on others to take care of me…”

Changkyun nodded, slowly starting to eat the stew.  “I just feel bad that I haven’t done all that much for you…” he began.

Hoseok shook his head.  “Don’t talk like that… you don’t _have_ to do anything for me, remember?  This isn’t a business transaction.  I wanted to save you, and there were no strings attached to that.  Whatever happens, all I want is for you to be happy.”

“You make me happy,” Changkyun replied softly.  The vampire smiled.  “I’m happier here than I have been for a long time… but I don’t want to impose…”

“You _aren’t_ imposing, though.”  Changkyun looked up at Hoseok’s words.  “I’ve invited you to be here… I _want_ you to stay.  And I want you to be happy.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, closing his eyes as Hoseok moved around the island so that he could press a kiss against his forehead.  “Eat, okay?  I’m going to go clean up a little before Hyungwon- _ah_ gets here.  But let me answer the door if it rings.”

Changkyun nodded again, going back to the bowl of stew and continuing to eat until he’d managed to finish all of it.  It was the first thing Changkyun had actually completely finished since he’d woken up in Hoseok’s apartment, and hitting the bottom of the bowl surprised him - especially given the fact that he was still hungry.

It felt strange, going to dig through the refrigerator.  Although Changkyun had been in the kitchen by himself before, this was the first time he’d actually needed to search for something to eat.  Everything Kihyun had left for him the last time the nurse had visited was gone, and Changkyun found himself searching through the various drawers and containers within for something that he might be able to eat.  The opaque drawers at the bottom of the fridge had always been kept closed, and Changkyun had never really paid much attention to them before.  But there wasn’t anything edible in the rest of the fridge, and Changkyun opened one of them without really thinking about it.

The sight of bags of blood sitting in the drawer made Changkyun feel sick to his stomach.  Somehow, he’d never really thought about the fact that Hoseok would have to keep his supply of blood somewhere - that it couldn’t just sit out in the open, where anyone would be able to see it and it could start to go bad.  But Changkyun hadn’t contemplated the fact that everything would be kept in the same fridge - that there would have been blood so close to the food he’d been eating for the past week.

Changkyun could hear the sound of the doorbell ringing, but he didn’t even turn to look at the door.  All Changkyun could do was close the fridge, backing away and leaning against the kitchen island instead.  “Hey… Changkyun- _ah_ , are you okay?”  Changkyun looked up at the sound of Hoseok’s voice, watching as the vampire studied his face carefully.  He could see a tall, thin man standing behind Hoseok, with dark hair and a full pout.  The man looked like he should be a model, especially given his stylish clothes.  “Changkyun- _ah_?”

“I’m sorry,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head and forcing a smile for the newcomer’s benefit.  “I think I’m going to go lay down… I’m really tired all of a sudden…”

Changkyun hurried out of the kitchen, shutting himself into the small bedroom before the vampire could say anything about his strange behavior.  His stomach was churning painfully, and Changkyun found himself hurrying into the small bathroom attached to his room and falling to his knees in front of the toilet as his body rejected all of the food he’d just eaten.  By the time he was done, Changkyun was too exhausted to move and he ended up falling asleep on the floor by the toilet.


	6. Shock

Changkyun was surprised to find himself back in his bed when he woke up again, wrapped in Hoseok’s arms.  The vampire looked more pale than Changkyun remembered; he couldn’t help worrying that his strange behavior the previous night had somehow concerned Hoseok enough that he hadn’t eaten while Hyungwon was at the apartment.  But Changkyun didn’t have a chance to really process what was going on, as the vampire woke up and smiled at him.  “How are you feeling?”

“Did you eat?” Changkyun asked softly, ignoring the man’s question.

Hoseok sighed, shaking his head.  “You don’t need to worry about whether or not I’ve eaten, Changkyun- _ah_.  Right now, I’m worried about why you got sick…”  Changkyun looked away from the vampire, wishing that he had some better explanation for what had happened.  “Changkyun- _ah_?”

“It just shocked me, _hyung_ … seeing all of the blood in the fridge.  I _know_ you drink blood.  I’m not stupid.  But it just… I wasn’t expecting to see it all sitting there like that.  And with everything already going on in my head yesterday, It was just all too much…”

Changkyun was surprised as Hoseok pulled him closer, pressing a soft kiss against the top of his head.  “I’m sorry… I should have warned you about the blood as soon as you were feeling well enough to explore,” the vampire replied.  “I didn’t think about how unsettling it would be for you to discover something like that.  But if something is wrong, or you’re upset about something, you can come talk to me about it.  You don’t have to hold things in just because I’m hungry or whatever…”

“I’m sorry if I scared you,” Changkyun replied softly, realizing that the vampire had probably been extremely worried when he’d discovered Changkyun sleeping in the bathroom floor.

“You don’t have to apologize for anything… as long as you’re okay, that’s all that really matters.”  Changkyun nodded slowly at Hoseok’s words, letting the vampire pull him closer and press a soft kiss against his temple.  “So again, how are you feeling?”

“Tired.  Kind of hungry,” Changkyun admitted.  “I was looking for something else to eat… and then I ended up throwing up everything I’d already eaten.”

The vampire nodded, smoothing down Changkyun’s hair for a moment before he pulled away from the embrace and sat up.  “It’s still dark out… I’ll run down to the convenience store on the corner and get something that won’t upset your stomach again.”

“I can go,” Changkyun replied, sitting up.  “I… I think I should go.  You don’t know what I eat…”

Changkyun was surprised when the vampire leaned in, pressing a soft kiss against his lips.  “Why don’t we go together, then?  You can teach me a little more about yourself while we walk.”  Changkyun nodded, smiling at the idea and letting Hoseok pull him to his feet.  He felt a little dizzy, but Hoseok was quick to put an arm around Changkyun’s waist to steady him.  “Are you sure you’ll be okay to walk that far?”

“I’ll be fine, _hyung_ ,” Changkyun replied, smiling.  “I think I just need to get some water… I’m probably a little dehydrated again, after getting sick.”  The vampire nodded, guiding him into the kitchen and sitting him down at the island again.  Everything had been cleaned up from Changkyun’s earlier meal, and he smiled as the vampire placed a glass of water on the counter in front of him.  “Thank you.”

“If the blood really bothers you that much, I can find somewhere else to store it,” Hoseok commented, staying on the far side of the counter to watch Changkyun drink the water.

Changkyun shook his head slowly.  “It’s okay… I was just shocked by finding it like that,” he replied.  “You don’t have to change things for me… I can just stay out of that part of the fridge, and it’ll be fine.”  Changkyun drank the water slowly, trying not to make himself sick by drinking too much too quickly.  The last thing he needed was to vomit again, when he’d finally been starting to feel better.

“If you’re sure… I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable here.”

Making the trip down to the convenience store didn’t take long, mostly because they had to get back to the apartment before the sun came up.  But Changkyun was surprised at just how much food Hoseok insisted on purchasing, even though he tried to explain that he would be able to go grocery shopping during the day and get food for the next few days.

“You do realize we basically just bought a week’s worth of groceries at the convenience store, right?  It’s all way more expensive than it should have been…” Changkyun began.  He felt a bit guilty that the man had spent so much money on him, but Hoseok hadn’t even given Changkyun a chance to pull out his wallet before the money had been in the cashier’s hand.

“Pretty sure I already told you that money’s not an issue,” Hoseok replied, as they both lugged a couple of carrier bags down the street towards the apartment building.  “Besides, this way you can relax during the day instead of trying to run errands…”

“I have to go back to the old apartment.”  Changkyun didn’t look up at the vampire as he spoke, worried about how he would respond to the fact that Changkyun intended to go out again once Hoseok had gone to sleep for the day.  Given how the previous day had ended, Changkyun had a feeling the older man wasn’t going to be happy with the idea.

Hoseok put in the code to open the front door of the building before responding.  “I don’t think it’s a good idea, Changkyun- _ah_ … you should try and get some rest.  You were so exhausted when you got home last night…”

“I could just go for a little while,” Changkyun replied as they made their way up to Hoseok’s apartment.  “It’s not like I’m sick… it was just stressful…”

Changkyun was surprised when Hoseok stopped, turning to face him and pressing a soft kiss against his forehead.  “So then wait for me to wake up… we’ll go tonight and deal with it.  Together.”  Changkyun closed his eyes, sighing.  “I just don’t like the idea of letting you go alone, after what happened earlier.  If it gets to be too much and you get sick again…”

“I won’t, _hyung_ ,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “It was just a fluke…”

Hoseok opened his front door as they arrived, holding it open for Changkyun to enter.  “You’re sure that you’ll be okay on your own?”

“Positive,” Changkyun replied, kicking off his shoes before following the vampire into the kitchen so they could deal with all of the food they’d just purchased.  “I won’t stay as long today, and I’ll take a nap after I eat, if it’ll make you feel better about me going.  But I don’t have that much longer to finish dealing with everything my parents left behind, and some of the things I need to take care of have to be done during the day…”

“At least take my phone, so that you can call Kihyun- _ah_ if you aren’t feeling well… I know that I can’t come help you during the day, but I can at least make sure that there’s _someone_ who can come get you if things go wrong.”

“Okay… I guess getting a new cell phone should probably be added to my to-do list, so that I don’t have to use yours forever,” Changkyun replied, grabbing one of the samgak gimbap they’d purchased and opening it to start eating as they put everything away.

Hoseok nodded, opening the fridge to put away some of the other cold items.  “Sit down and eat - I’ve got this.”

“You should go start getting ready for bed… the sun will be coming up soon, and you don’t want to get caught out here,” Changkyun replied.  “I can eat and put everything away at the same time…”

Changkyun watched as Hoseok smiled, moving closer to him and pressing another kiss against his forehead.  “You’re going to stay on me until I do go to bed, aren’t you?”

“That’s the plan,” Changkyun replied.

“Why don’t you come take a nap with me when you’re done?  I know you probably need some more sleep, after everything that happened last night…”

Changkyun nodded.  “I can do that.  But you need to go, before it’s too late.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm not happy with this chapter... I don't know what's going on with this story any more, but I have two others that I'm writing simultaneously (neither of which are posted) and I like them a lot more than this one right now. That doesn't mean I'm abandoning this story... it just means that updates may take a little longer as I try to figure out what's going to happen.


	7. Hungry

Changkyun didn’t even realize he’d slept most of the day until he snuck out of the vampire’s bedroom, surprised to see the sun already starting to set outside.  He sighed, shaking his head as he made his way into the kitchen and opened up the fridge again, pulling out something to eat to settle the aching growl in his stomach.  Changkyun felt bad about not getting anything accomplished, knowing that there were still a lot of things to be done back at the apartment before he could officially turn over the keys to the landlord.

By the time he’d finished eating, the sun had gone down enough that Hoseok could safely leave the confines of his bedroom and Changkyun smiled at the vampire as he entered the kitchen.  “You left my cell phone in my room…” Hoseok began.

“I didn’t leave… I ended up sleeping longer than I’d expected, and I only woke up a little while ago because I was hungry,” Changkyun replied.  He watched as Hoseok nodded, before starting towards the fridge.

Hoseok stopped short, turning to look at Changkyun.  “Is it going to bother you if I eat in front of you?  I could wait until you’re asleep…”

“You didn’t eat last night, did you?”  Changkyun sighed as Hoseok shook his head.  “I think I’ll be okay, as long as it isn’t too close to me.  Or maybe you could put it in a cup or something, so it doesn’t look so much like blood?”

The vampire smiled, nodding.  “I can do that.  But if it bothers you, I can always put it away for a while.”

“Or you could always let me feed you again… since it’s my fault that you’re a day late eating this time,” Changkyun replied, even though he knew that Hoseok wouldn’t agree.  Still, he couldn’t help wanting to help the man, knowing that his breakdown had been the reason Hoseok was so hungry.

“You know I can’t do that.”  Changkyun nodded, not looking up as Hoseok began to get blood from the fridge.  “I don’t want to do anything that might actually hurt you… and you don’t need to lose any more blood right now, when you haven’t really been able to physically recover from everything that’s happened.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, cleaning up from his own meal as the vampire emptied a bag of blood into a glass and began to eat.  “If you’re still wanting to go to your apartment tonight, I could go with you…”

Changkyun nodded.  “That would be nice… I know there isn’t a lot we can do, but it does sort of freak me out to go out there alone at night…”

Hoseok smiled, shaking his head.  “You have my fang marks on your neck… no vampire in their right mind would touch you…”

“It isn’t just the fact that there are vampires that worry me,” Changkyun replied, not looking up at the man.  “My parents died at night… the other driver fell asleep…”

Having the vampire’s arms wrap around his torso didn’t really surprise Changkyun; he was quickly getting used to the fact that Hoseok was extremely physically affectionate towards him.  But he still couldn’t help shivering slightly at the vampire’s cold touch.  “I’m sorry, Changkyun- _ah_.”

“I’m okay,” Changkyun replied, relaxing into Hoseok’s arms.  The truth was that he didn’t really feel the surge of pain that he was used to from talking about his parents and their deaths; his emotions weren’t pleasant, but they weren’t nearly as difficult to handle as they had been before.  “I think being out of the apartment is helping… it’s still not easy, but it’s not as awful as it was before…”

Changkyun closed his eyes as Hoseok pressed a kiss against his temple.  “I’m glad it’s helping,” Hoseok replied.  “You know that you can come to me if you need anything, right?  That I won’t judge you for anything you tell me.”

“I know, _hyung_ ,” Changkyun replied, smiling as he let his head rest against the vampire’s shoulder.

There was a brief moment of silence, before the vampire spoke again.  “Can I ask you a question, Changkyun- _ah_?”  Changkyun hesitated for a moment; while he wanted to be open and honest with the man, he couldn’t help the worry that Hoseok would ask something of him that he wasn’t ready to talk about.  Still, it seemed as if the vampire could read his mind.  “I promise I won’t be upset if you don’t answer, or if you say that you can’t answer right now…”

Changkyun sighed, nodding.  “Okay… what is it you want to ask?”

“I know that it hasn’t been all that long since you lost your parents, and you’ve been through a lot since then… but have you thought about talking to someone?” Hoseok asked softly.

“I talk to you, _hyung_ …” Changkyun replied, standing up a little straighter and looking at the vampire to try and understand what he meant.

“I know.  And I’m glad that you trust me enough to tell me what’s going on in your head.  But I’m thinking about specifically talking to someone with a bit more expertise in dealing with grief and trauma… like a doctor,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun looked down at the floor, unsure of how to respond.  “You don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.  I just don’t want to see you get hurt, and I’m worried that you might not be completely prepared when everything that’s happened really hits you.”

Changkyun bit his lip, nodding slightly.  “I’m not ready for that yet, _hyung_.  But… I’ll think about it.”

Hoseok smiled, stroking a hand through Changkyun’s hair before he spoke again.  “Okay.  That’s all I’m asking of you.”  Changkyun nodded, pulling away from the vampire after a moment.  “I’m going to finish eating, if you want to go take a shower and clean up a little bit before we go…”

“Is that a hint that I smell bad, _hyung_?” Changkyun asked, smirking slightly.

“Not at all… but I know that you didn’t handle the idea of me feeding well last night, so I doubt that you really want to see me openly drinking blood out of the fridge,” Hoseok replied.  “Go take care of yourself, yeah?  I’m going to finish my meal and clean up out here a little bit.”  Changkyun closed his eyes as Hoseok pressed a kiss against his forehead, before gently pushing him towards the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short. And not great. But I feel bad about not having anything posted for so long (and for the fact that I am now simultaneously writing THREE other stories because too many ideas).


	8. Warm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually have a new chapter for you guys! I know it's taken me a while... I have too many other ideas in my head, and this one just isn't as interesting to me as it used to be. But I am still working on this story - just at a slower pace - so please don't give up on it yet!

Changkyun sat with his legs crossed, silently staring at the stacks of stuff he wasn’t really sure what he should do with.  Hoseok had helped him haul everything out of the old apartment - a task that had taken a few days, given the limited amount of time they’d had to actually work and the rain that had refused to let up for most of the last week.  Changkyun had discovered after their first day sharing a bed that he slept significantly better in the vampire’s bed, curled into Hoseok’s side despite the fact that the older man had no body heat to share.

The two had piled everything into the small bedroom Changkyun had used at first, leaving it so that Changkyun could sort through everything at his own pace without having to worry about the deadline to turn in his apartment keys.  It had actually been nice, but Changkyun still felt a bit overwhelmed by all of it and he often found himself just sitting and staring at the bags and boxes that still filled the room.  It was physically and emotionally exhausting, trying to deal with everything on his own.

“It’s getting late… are you ready to go to bed?”  

Changkyun looked up at Hoseok’s words, smiling and nodding slightly.  “Yeah… I don’t think I’m going to get much more done tonight, honestly.”  Changkyun couldn’t help smiling wider as Hoseok walked over and took his hands, pulling him up to his feet.  “I wish I could just get all of this handled already… I hate having to look at all of these things that I don’t even want to see any more…”

“I’m sorry… I can get rid of the rest of it…?”

Changkyun was quick to shake his head, interrupting Hoseok before he could finish his suggestion.  “No… no, I can’t…”  The vampire looked confused, and Changkyun sighed.  “I just… I’m tired of trying to deal with all of it.  But I’m afraid that if I _don’t_ go through everything thoroughly, I’m going to miss something important… something that I wouldn’t want to part with.”

Hoseok seemed to understand then, almost as if Changkyun’s words made perfect sense - even though Changkyun himself wasn’t sure that _he_ understood what was going on in his head.  “Let’s just go to bed, then… you should take tomorrow night off, do something for yourself instead of stressing out about getting everything finished,” Hoseok replied, pressing a soft kiss against his forehead.  That was something else Changkyun had gotten used to - the random, soft press of cold lips against his warm skin.  It was nice - Changkyun had never been one to dislike physical affection from those he cared about - but Changkyun couldn’t help finding himself thinking more about what Hoseok _hadn’t_ done.

“ _Hyung_ … can I ask you something?”  The words came out softly, mostly because Changkyun was afraid of the consequences of the question that had come to mind that night.  But Hoseok didn’t seem to be worried about what Changkyun might ask, as the vampire nodded, squeezing Changkyun’s hands to encourage him to ask his question.  “Do you… why haven’t you tried to do anything more than kiss me?”

The look on Hoseok’s face told Changkyun that the man was confused by his words.  “I’ve fed from you…” he began.

Changkyun shook his head.  “No… I mean like, sexually…”

“Ah… that.”  There was an awkward silence, as Hoseok seemed to be thinking about what to say.  “I didn’t want you to feel pressured, so I hadn’t approached the subject.  And honestly, sex is… different for me.  I can get an erection, but I would have to feed from a living donor right before fooling around for that to happen.”

“So it’s not because you aren’t attracted to me?”

Hoseok chuckled slightly, shaking his head.  The sound finally relaxed Changkyun, although he did feel a bit silly for thinking that the vampire hadn’t found him appealing, given everything that had happened between the two of them thus far.  “That definitely isn’t it… I think you’re incredibly attractive.  But you’ve been through a lot in the past few weeks, and I wouldn’t want to do anything that might hurt you…”  Changkyun nodded slowly, letting the vampire pull him towards his chest.  “If it’s something you really want, we can try it tomorrow night.  But for now, we should get into my room before the sun comes up…”

Changkyun nodded, letting the vampire guide him into the other bedroom to get ready for bed.  They’d settled into a bit of a routine when it came to the end of their nights, which usually resulted in Changkyun curling up between the vampire and the wall, letting his head rest against the vampire’s chest.  He was comfortable there, and Changkyun felt relaxed and calm enough to fall asleep easily in that position - something he hadn’t really felt since his parents’ deaths.

“You’re warm.”  

Changkyun raised an eyebrow at Hoseok’s words, surprised when the vampire moved to cuddle him a bit closer.  “I’m always warm, _hyung_ … at least, compared to you.”

“No… like, warmer than normal,” Hoseok replied.  “Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m just tired… nothing unusual,” Changkyun replied, letting his eyes close as he felt Hoseok stroking his hair.  It was a comforting gesture, and Changkyun couldn’t help feeling himself start to drift off when Hoseok did it.

Hoseok pressed a kiss against the top of Changkyun’s head.  “But you’ll tell me if that changes, right?”

Changkyun nodded slowly against the vampire’s chest, already starting to fall asleep.  “Yeah… sure, _hyung_.”

Waking up a few hours later was disorienting, especially given the fact that Changkyun’s neck was aching and he was shivering against the vampire’s overly warm chest.  He could feel Hoseok gently rubbing his back, obviously still awake.  

“ _Hyung_?”  Changkyun winced; his throat felt as though someone was dragging broken glass across the back of it.

“You’re feverish…”  Changkyun felt Hoseok pull him a bit closer.  “I called Kihyun a little while ago… he said that he’d come over when he got off work.”

“I’m sorry…” Changkyun began.

“Don’t you dare apologize, Changkyun- _ah_.  You’re human, it happens…”

“But I’m keeping you awake.”

Changkyun winced slightly as Hoseok turned on the lamp next to the bed and gently moved his body so that they were facing one another.  The light hurt his eyes, and moving made everything _else_ hurt.  “I don’t _need_ to sleep.  I can, and I usually do because there isn’t much else I can do during the day.  But right now, I need to stay awake and take care of you so that whatever this is doesn’t get worse.”

“All you do is take care of me…” Changkyun began.

“You’ve taken care of me,” Hoseok replied, pressing a kiss against the side of his neck.  “Besides, I think I love you…”

The words were surprising to Changkyun; the word _love_ wasn’t something they’d brought up before.  It hadn’t really been that long since Hoseok had found Changkyun at the auction - less than a month - but somehow it wasn’t uncomfortable like Changkyun had expected it to be.  Still, it was enough of a shock that Changkyun found himself unable to respond for a moment.

“You don’t have to say it back, if you aren’t there yet,” Hoseok finally added.  “I’m not upset or offended.  But I do feel that way, and it seemed like you needed to hear it today.”  Changkyun closed his eyes as he felt Hoseok pressing another soft kiss against his forehead.  “Now, tell me what hurts?”

“Everything,” Changkyun replied softly.  “Especially my neck…”

The vampire carefully shifted their positions, so that Changkyun was sitting up and leaning back against his chest.  The vampire’s hands were cool against his skin, gently massaging the sore muscles to try and help him relax and fall back to sleep.

Changkyun, however, wasn’t sure that he _wanted_ to go back to sleep now that he knew how Hoseok felt.  “ _Hyung_ …?”

“Hm?”  Hoseok only made a soft noise to indicate that he’d heard Changkyun, not really responding to the question in his word.

“I really do like you…” Changkyun began.

“Shh… we can talk about it later.  Just rest right now.  Try to go back to sleep,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun nodded slowly, even though he wasn’t sure that he _would_ be able to go to sleep.

“You don’t have any painkillers?” Changkyun asked softly.

“I don’t… I’m sorry,” Hoseok replied.  “I’ll get Kihyun to bring something when he comes by, okay?”  

Changkyun nodded slowly, wincing at the movement.  “I think I need some water…” he began, trying to force himself up into a seated position.  A sudden wave of nausea washed over him, and he didn’t even realize that he was starting to fall over until he felt Hoseok putting a hand on his back to hold him up.  “I’m sorry…”

“Shh… don’t apologize.”  Changkyun felt Hoseok putting an arm around his torso, holding him up so that he wouldn’t fall over.  “Why don’t you lay back down, and I’ll bring you some water from the sink in the bathroom.”

“I think I’m going to be sick…” Changkyun began, even though he didn’t really have the energy to move on his own.  The vampire was quick to pick him up from the bed, hurrying him into the bathroom so that Changkyun could get sick without making a mess.  He barely managed to lean over the toilet before he was vomiting up what little he had in his stomach, with Hoseok gently rubbing his back.

By the time he was finished, Changkyun could barely even sit up on his own.  “Do you feel better now?”  Changkyun nodded slowly.  “Do you want to go back to bed?”

“I feel gross… can I take a shower first?” Changkyun asked softly.

“How about a warm bath instead?” Hoseok suggested.  “I’m not sure that you can stand up long enough to shower right now, and I don’t want you to hurt yourself…”  Changkyun nodded slowly, letting the vampire gently move him away from the toilet so that he could lean against the wall as Hoseok filled the tub.  “Do you think you can get out of your pajamas?”

Changkyun did his best to strip off the damp tee shirt he wore, barely managing to get it off before the vampire was turning off the water.  “I’m sorry, _hyung_ …”

“You apologize too much,” Hoseok replied, carefully picking him up from the floor and helping him slip out of the boxers he’d been sleeping in before he’d woken up sick.  “Let’s get you into the water, and I’ll go grab something else from my closet for you to wear tonight.”  Changkyun nodded, letting the older man gently lower him into the warm water.  It felt good on his sore muscles, and Changkyun relaxed further into the tub as the older man gently pushed the hair out of his face.  “You going to be okay for a few minutes?”

“Yeah… it feels really good…” Changkyun replied, letting his eyes close.

“Don’t fall asleep in there… I can’t exactly run you to the emergency room right now if you start to drown…”

“I’m not going to fall asleep… I just need to rest my eyes.”


	9. Sick

Changkyun woke up coughing, which only seemed to make his headache and sore throat worse.  It wasn’t until he’d stopped coughing and curled up on his side that he felt a cool hand pressed against the side of his face.  “How long has he been like this?”  Changkyun recognized Kihyun’s voice.

“He was starting to run a fever when we went to bed this morning,” Hoseok replied.  “He woke up a little while after I texted you and said his neck was hurting, and then he got sick…”

“He probably has the flu… it’s been going around, and we’ve been seeing a lot of it at the hospital,” Kihyun replied.  “Changkyun- _ah_?  Can we sit you up so I can take a look at you?”

Changkyun nodded slowly, starting to push himself up into a seated position with Hoseok’s help.  He eventually just let the vampire move him, leaning back against the older man’s chest and closing his eyes.  “I’ve been trying to get him to drink water, but he hasn’t been awake much.”

“I’m going to take your temperature first, Changkyun- _ah_ ,” Kihyun commented.  Changkyun just nodded, opening his mouth obediently and letting Kihyun place the thermometer under his tongue.  The beep of the device as it completed its job sounded like an explosion in his head, even though Changkyun knew it wasn’t really that loud.  “Head hurting?”

“Yeah,” Changkyun replied, nodding carefully to prevent his neck from aching even more than it already did.

“Sore throat?”

“You can tell that from my voice?” Changkyun asked softly.

“It’s definitely not good,” Kihyun replied.  “Let me look at your throat, okay?”  Changkyun obediently opened his mouth, letting the older man use his phone to look at the back of his throat.  “Well, at least it doesn’t look like you have strep, too.  I can’t give you an actual diagnosis without a flu test, but I think it’s pretty safe to say that’s what you have.  Which unfortunately means that you’re going to have to just wait it out.”

“Right… so we just have to wait a few days, and then he’ll be okay?”

“As long as he doesn’t get worse or let himself get dehydrated again,” Kihyun replied.  “If he’s having trouble getting fluids down, I can start another IV… it would at least take some of the pressure off you, since you can’t really leave this room during the day.  And I can go get something for his fever from the pharmacy.”

Changkyun felt Hoseok gently stroking his hair, starting to lull him back to sleep.  He was just too exhausted; Changkyun’s whole body felt as if it was filled with lead, and even the small amount of effort he’d made to move a few moments earlier had drained what little energy he had from sleeping for so long.  “I think you should start the IV… he’s already getting dehydrated, and I don’t want to risk it getting worse…” Hoseok began.  Changkyun nodded slowly in agreement, too tired to really be able to move more than that.  “Even he’s agreeing with me.”

“Everything’s still in the other room?” Kihyun asked.

“Yeah.  I haven’t touched any of it.”

“I’ll be right back… try and get him to drink some of the water I brought.”  

Changkyun felt the vampire nodding, carefully sitting him up a little more before bringing a bottle of water to his lips and slowly tilting it so that Changkyun could drink a little bit.  Changkyun pushed the bottle away a moment later, as the liquid started to make him feel sick to his stomach.  “I feel sick…”

“You need to drink more, baby,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun shook his head, closing his eyes.  The vampire sighed, pressing a soft kiss against his temple.  “Okay.  We’ll try again in a little while.”

“I just want to sleep…” Changkyun began softly.

“So then sleep… Kihyun- _ah_ can start the IV without you being awake, and you need to rest…”  Changkyun nodded slowly, letting himself relax as Hoseok gently stroked his hair to help him fall asleep again.  “I’m going to lay you down, okay?  You’ll be more comfortable…”

“I want you to stay with me, _hyung_ ,” Changkyun replied.

Hoseok’s chuckle vibrated against his back.  “I’m not going anywhere, baby… I just want to make you a bit more comfortable.  You need to rest if you’re going to get better.”

“How’s he doing?”  Changkyun forced his eyes open at Kihyun’s question, watching as the man carefully laid out his supplies on the bed next to them.  “Did he drink the water?”

“A few sips,” Hoseok replied softly.  “He said he felt sick, and I didn’t want to push it for fear that he would vomit again…”

Kihyun nodded.  “At least we’re starting an IV now… he’ll be okay, even if he can’t really drink much on his own right now.”  Changkyun watched as Kihyun unwrapped the supplies with his gloved hands, before taking Changkyun’s right arm and starting to prepare a spot on the back of his hand for the IV line.  The rubber tubing was tight around his forearm as Kihyun tried to find a good vein, and Changkyun whimpered softly as the other man had to tighten it again.  “I’m sorry, Changkyun- _ah_ … I know that it hurts, but I have to get a vein…”

“Can you try higher up his arm?” Hoseok suggested.

“I don’t think it’ll be any easier… he’s so dehydrated,” Kihyun replied.  “I have one I think I can get, but I don’t have another needle if I can’t get it.  Which means I may _have_ to take him into the hospital if I can’t get it…”

Changkyun groaned.  “Just do it,” he replied softly, closing his eyes as he began to cough again.  He couldn’t get enough oxygen into his system until the coughing subsided, and Changkyun’s head was spinning by the time it was over.

“Shit… _hyung_ , help me hold him up.  I need to listen to him breathe…”  Changkyun whimpered softly as Hoseok carefully pushed him so that he as actually sitting up, with Hoseok and Kihyun working together to help him stay upright as Kihyun pressed a stethoscope Changkyun hadn’t noticed before against his chest underneath his shirt.  “Breathe in for me, Changkyun- _ah_ … as deep as you can.”

Changkyun did as he was told, not bothering to open his eyes.  It seemed to take forever before Kihyun finally finished listening.  “Fuck… _hyung_ , I’m sorry… but he has to go to the hospital.  I’m going to have to call an ambulance…”

“What’s wrong?” Hoseok asked.  Changkyun forced his eyes open as Kihyun removed the rubber tubing around his arm, moving everything he’d brought in to start the IV away from the bed.

“He’s really only been sick since this morning?” Kihyun asked, ignoring the question.

“Kihyun… what’s going on?”  Changkyun winced as Hoseok raised his voice to get the man’s attention.

“His lungs don’t sound right… I’m not sure, but it sounds like he may already be developing pneumonia.  I can deal with the dehydration and simple cases of the flu, but he’s already starting to develop complications… and there’s nothing I can do for him if he’s really that sick,” Kihyun replied.  “He’s too weak for public transportation at this point… and you can’t help me get him to the hospital for a few more hours.  By that point, it might be too late…”

“Shit…”  Changkyun felt the man tightening his grip around Changkyun’s body, pressing a soft kiss against his temple.  “I’m so sorry, baby…”

Changkyun shook his head, closing his eyes.  “’S not your fault…” Changkyun replied, starting to drift off again as Kihyun made the necessary phone call.

“How could he have gotten so sick so quickly?  He was fine last night, other than the fever…”  Changkyun could hear the vampire talking about him, although he was too weak to really fight to stay awake.

“I don’t know,” Kihyun replied.  “He _shouldn’t_ be this sick already, not if it started as just the flu… it takes time to develop pneumonia.”  Changkyun whimpered softly as he felt the vampire moving him to lay down on the bed, reaching out for Hoseok to prevent the vampire from going too far from him.  “I’ll ride along with him, and I’ll let you know as soon as they let me know what’s going on… but they’re going to ask about his family…”

“They’re all dead,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun could feel the vampire carefully stroking his hair as he spoke, still holding onto one of Changkyun’s hands.  “He lost his parents a few weeks before I found him… he doesn’t have anyone else.”

“I’ll say he’s my brother, so that the doctor will talk to me.”


	10. Turn

“The aren’t sure why his lungs have filled with fluid… but they’ve drained as much of it as they safely can.  The doctor wants to run more tests…”  Changkyun forced his eyes open, turning towards the sound of Kihyun’s voice.  He was thankful to see Hoseok standing there with the nurse, arms crossed as he listened to Kihyun’s explanation of the current situation.  “They started him on some antibiotics so that he wouldn’t get any worse, but there isn’t much else they can do right now…”

“They don’t have any ideas?” Hoseok asked softly, clearly trying not to wake Changkyun up.

“Not yet,” Kihyun replied.  “They’re pretty sure it started as a flu bug, but they can’t explain why he got so sick so quickly.”  There was a brief moment of silence before Kihyun spoke again.  “ _Hyung_ … he’s in bad shape.  If his lungs start to fill again… there’s only so much they can do if they don’t figure out what’s causing him to get so sick so quickly.  And even if they _do_ figure out, some of the possibilities aren’t good…”

There was a moment of silence, before Hoseok spoke again.  “I can turn him…” Hoseok began.  “It isn’t ideal, but if it’ll keep him in my life…”

“You should ask him first, _hyung_ … let him choose,” Kihyun replied.  “You know how difficult it is to deal with being turned into a vampire… and even though he’ll have you, he’s still going to struggle to come to terms with not being human…”

Hoseok nodded.  “I’ll ask him first… I don’t want to hurt him.”  Changkyun was thankful when Hoseok finally turned towards him, smiling and moving towards the bed as he saw that Changkyun was awake.  “Hey… how are you feeling?”  Changkyun closed his eyes for a moment as Hoseok carefully pushed the hair out of his face, before leaning in to press a soft kiss against his forehead.

“I’m sorry, _hyung_ …” Changkyun replied, pulling the oxygen mask away from his face so that he could talk more easily

“Shh… don’t even think about apologizing for getting sick,” Hoseok interrupted, taking the mask and moving it back into place.  “This isn’t your fault.”

Changkyun shook his head.  “I’m just in the way… I’m always screwing things up for you…”

“What are you screwing up, really?  I _want_ to take care of you.  I want to make sure that you’re okay, and I want to spend time with you so that I can learn more about you and fall more in love with you,” Hoseok replied softly.  “I want to spend my eternity with you, Changkyun- _ah_.”

“Okay,” Changkyun replied, nodding slowly.  “Do it.”

The look of confusion on Hoseok’s face told him that the man hadn’t realized Changkyun was awake during the conversation with Kihyun.  “What…?”

“Turn me,” Changkyun replied, pulling the mask away again.  “Make me like you.”

Hoseok shook his head.  “I can’t do it here… and I won’t do that yet.  Not until I know we don’t have any other choices,” Hoseok replied.

“Tell me what happens.”  Changkyun reached up to take the vampire’s hand.  “Does it hurt?”

“It isn’t bad,” Hoseok replied, squeezing his hand gently.  “I’ll bite you first… that’s the worst part, because I have to take more than I would if I was just feeding.  You have to be on the verge of death…”

“You may not have to take much to get him to that point, _hyung_ ,” Kihyun reminded softly.  “As sick as he is, taking much could push his body too far…”

“I know what I’m doing, Kihyun- _ah_ ,” Hoseok replied softly, before quickly turning back to Changkyun.  “I’ll give you my own blood at that point.  Once you’ve had enough, you’ll go to sleep for a while… probably at least a day or two, while your body changes.  And then, it’ll all be over, and we can _live_.”

Changkyun smiles at the thought, even though he knows that Hoseok is probably glossing over some of the details - like the fact that in order for this to happen, he has to _die_.  But somehow, Changkyun finds himself not really caring about the fact that he’ll never truly be alive again, because he knows that it means he’ll be able to stay with Hoseok.

“I want that,” Changkyun replied, nodding slightly.  “I want to be with you forever.”  He closed his eyes as Hoseok leaned in to press a kiss against his forehead.

“Try to rest now, Changkyun- _ah_ … we’ll talk about it more later, once we know what we’re dealing with.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I apologize that this is so short; I'm just still not really feeling this story all that much. I've got a better idea of where it's headed now, but it's still going to take me some time to get this all sorted and posted. Hopefully the next chapter will be up faster than this one was!


	11. Break

Waking up coated in sweat was far from pleasant, but Changkyun couldn’t help noticing that despite the overwhelming exhaustion in his limbs, he no longer felt as though he was dying.  “Hey, _hyung_ … I just wanted to let you know that Changkyun- _ah_ ’s fever broke this morning.”  There was a brief silence following Kihyun’s words, and Changkyun slowly forced his head to turn towards the sound of the nurse’s voice.  “The doctor says his lungs are starting to fill again… the antibiotics are killing the infection that made him so sick, but they can’t stop him from getting sick again.  I think… I think it may be in his best interests to start seriously talking about what he asked you to do last night.”

“Kihyun- _ssi_?” Changkyun asked softly, watching as Kihyun turned and smiled at him, holding up a hand to indicate that he would just be a second.

“Listen, he’s awake, so I should go.  I’ll see you tonight.”  Kihyun hung up the phone, slipping it back into his pocket before moving over towards the bed.  “How are you feeling?”

“I’m tired,” Changkyun replied.

“Then you should rest.”  

Changkyun nodded, closing his eyes.  “I heard what you said…”

“We can talk about it later,” Kihyun replied.

“No… I want to talk about it now,” Changkyun interrupted.  “Hoseok- _hyung_ said he can’t do it here… but I don’t know how I’m going to get out of the hospital…”

Changkyun heard Kihyun sigh.  “You have to refuse treatment… there will be a lot of questions, and then you’ll have to sit through a detailed explanation of what they think will happen to you if you refuse treatment,” Kihyun began.  “After that, you’ll have to confirm again that you don’t want to change your mind.  And then there will be a lot of paperwork to sign, before they’ll finally remove the monitors and IV.”

“And then you’ll take me back to Hoseok- _hyung_ ’s apartment, right?” Changkyun asked.

“That’s right.  From there, you already know what will happen.”  Changkyun nodded slowly.  “You still have the option to change your mind, you know.  Or you can choose to wait a little while longer before you make a decision, to get stronger and possibly recover…”

“I’m dying, Kihyun- _ssi_ … I heard you tell Hoseok- _hyung_ that it’s time,” Changkyun interrupted.  “Please don’t try to convince me that I’m rushing into this or something.  I know exactly what I’m asking for.  I’m not going to change my mind… I’m not ready to die…”

“Okay… if you’re sure that this is what you really want, we’ll make it happen,” Kihyun replied.

Changkyun was thankful for Kihyun’s presence, because the older man knew exactly how Changkyun needed to address the situation so that he could actually leave the hospital.  The first thing Kihyun did was call for a nurse, to let her know exactly what was going on - or at least as much as they _could_ tell her, given what Changkyun intended to do once he arrived at home.

“Mr. Lim… do you understand that leaving the hospital at this point is extremely dangerous?  Your fever may have broken, but your body is still fighting a serious infection and without the proper treatment you _will_ die.”  

“I know that there’s no explanation, and that my lungs are filling with fluid again for no reason… I’m going to die either way,” Changkyun replied, shaking his head.  “If I have to go, I want to die at home.  With the people I care about.”

The nurse nodded, sighing.  “I’ll call the doctor in to talk to you as soon as possible.  It may be later this afternoon before he can come talk with you, but I’ll let him know what’s going on.”

“Thank you,” Changkyun replied, forcing a smile.

“Would it be possible for me to help him take a bath while we wait?” Kihyun asked.  “His fever broke, and he’s soaked in his own sweat…”

The nurse nodded again.  “Of course.  Give me just a moment to go contact his doctor, and then we can help you get cleaned up.”

Changkyun waited until the nurse was gone.  “Kihyun- _ssi_ … is this really necessary?” he asked.  “If I’m going home today…”

“Do you really want to sit here in your own sweat all afternoon?” Kihyun asked.  “Besides, it isn’t good for you to sit around in a wet hospital gown.  We can get you out of the bed for a little while and change the sheets, too, so that you’ll be more comfortable for the rest of the time you’re here.”  Changkyun nodded slowly, realizing that the older man was right; he _would_ be more comfortable if he wasn’t sitting there trying not to shiver from being coated in sweat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know that this is two short chapters in a row... but at least I'm actually getting chapters out!
> 
> I'm probably going to be finishing this one up in the next couple of chapters, honestly. I just need to get it done, so that I can start working on posting some of the other ideas I have (without getting myself all mixed up, because I KNOW I would accidentally post a chapter on the wrong story if I was to try to post multiple WIPs at the same time!).


	12. Turn

“You owe me for the cab…” Kihyun muttered, as he hauled Changkyun down the hallway towards Hoseok’s bedroom.  The sun was still just a little too high for the vampire to come join them, but Changkyun really couldn’t focus on much of anything other than forcing air into his lungs.

“Yeah…” he wheezed, leaning heavily on the nurse as they finally reached the door.  Changkyun was thankful that the hallway was dark enough so that they could open the door without having to worry about whether or not Hoseok would be hurt by the light.

The light was already on when Kihyun opened the door just enough to get the two of them inside, and Changkyun could see that Hoseok had already done what he could to prepare for what they were about to do.  The bed had already been made, and Hoseok had pushed back the blankets so that Changkyun could lay down.  There were also clean pajamas on the end of the bed, clearly ready for him to get comfortable before they actually proceeded with their plan.

“Are you planning on staying, Kihyun _-ah_?” Hoseok asked, hurrying over to put Changkyun’s free arm around his own shoulders and help them the rest of the way across the room.

“Not unless you need me… I like the kid, but I don’t want to see anyone turning into a vampire,” Kihyun replied.

Changkyun sat down on the side of the bed, watching as Hoseok nodded.  “Would you mind grabbing a couple of blood packs from the fridge for me?  I’m going to need to feed when I’m done, and I don’t think it would be a good idea to wait…”

“Just wait until I’m gone to bite him, yeah?  Like I said, I don’t want to see it,” Kihyun replied.

“Of course.”  

The nurse was gone a moment later, hurrying to the kitchen as Hoseok gently helped Changkyun take the shirt he was wearing off, without saying a word.  “I’m ready, _hyung_.”

“I know,” Hoseok replied softly.  “I can hear it… the way you’re struggling to breathe.  Your heart isn’t working properly, either, because of the lack of oxygen getting into your system.”  Changkyun closed his eyes, letting the man help him put on the clean shirt, which had a large, open collar that allowed easy access to his neck.

Kihyun was back in the room for just a moment, dropping two packs of blood on the table next to the bed.  “Call me if you need anything after it’s over…”

“You won’t be able to come over for a few days after he wakes up,” Hoseok replied.  “Until he has a handle on his senses, I won’t be able to have anyone human come over.  But thank you for offering.”

It only took a few minutes for Hoseok to help him finish changing, laying him down in the bed carefully.  “It’s going to hurt?” Changkyun asked softly.

“Only for a moment… just like the last time I bit you, remember?”  Changkyun nodded slowly.  “Good.  You have to stay awake for me… you have to be able to drink, when I’m finished.  Can you do that?”

“Yeah… just do it fast, okay?”

Changkyun took the deepest breath he could, turning his head so that Hoseok had easy access to the spot he’d bitten previously.  The vampire leaned down slowly, pressing a soft kiss against the skin before pressing his fangs into the skin again.

The pain was pretty much exactly what Changkyun remembered from his previous experience with being bitten, but somehow it felt different because he knew that the man wasn’t going to stop until he was close to death.  The fact that Hoseok’s hand was pressed gently against his chest was definitely different.

By the time Hoseok pulled away, it was just about all Changkyun could do to keep himself awake.  Everything felt fuzzy and numb, and he didn’t have the strength to even move his hands.  But it only took a moment for Changkyun to feel Hoseok lifting his head gently, holding a bleeding wrist to his lips.  

“Drink, Changkyun- _ah_.”  He did as he was told, using what little strength he had left to suck the red liquid from the vampire’s veins.  It was strange - thick and slightly metallic, but with an unfamiliar sweetness behind it that Changkyun knew he would never be able to describe.  It wasn’t a great taste, but it as far from the unpleasant sensation he’d expected it to be.  He closed his eyes as he sucked, before Hoseok finally pulled his hand away.  “That’s enough… you can let go now.  Let yourself go to sleep, and when you wake up, it’ll all be over.”

“Thank you, _hyung_ ,” Changkyun whispered, before allowing himself to drift off.


	13. Thirst

It only felt as if a moment had passed by the time Changkyun was aware of his surroundings again, and yet everything seemed to be different.  Without even opening his eyes, he could tell that Hoseok was next to him in the bed despite the fact that they weren’t even touching one another.  Every sensation seemed much more intense than it had been before - even the slightest noise was like a freight train in his head, and even the gentle currents of the air caused by the building’s HVAC system seemed excessively obvious against Changkyun’s skin.

But the worst sensation of all was the _thirst_.  Changkyun could _smell_ blood, and he wanted nothing more than to go search it out and drink his fill.  It was almost maddening, how delicious the smell was as Changkyun opened his eyes.  He wasn’t sure that he had enough energy to actually sit up and find blood on his own, no matter how desperately he _needed_ to drink and sate his thirst.

“You’re awake…”

“I’m thirsty,” Changkyun replied, turning to look at Hoseok.  “It’s safe to go to the kitchen?”

Hoseok shook his head.  “Ten more minutes… if the sunlight is above the horizon, it’s too dangerous to risk it,” he replied.

Changkyun nodded slowly, before suddenly realizing just how much he _didn’t_ know.  While he was familiar with some of the folklore surrounding vampires, there were certain aspects of his new life that Changkyun hadn’t thought to question prior to agreeing to letting Hoseok turn him to save his life.  “Would we burst into flames or something?” he asked, remembering an old vampire movie he’d watched with a friend at university.

“Not the way you see in movies… but the sunlight burns like hell.  Your skin will blister, and eventually start to disintegrate,” Hoseok replied.  “I watched it happen to my sire… he was ancient, and tired of living this way.  I was the only vampire he’d ever created, and he hated himself for ending my life without my permission…”

“You never wanted this life…” Changkyun began.  Suddenly, Kihyun’s words from the first day they met made more sense than they ever had before.

“Very few people would, unless they were dying and wanted to stay alive for some reason,” Hoseok replied, shaking his head.  “I hated myself for killing people so that I could live.  I wanted to die, until Minhyuk convinced me that I was capable of feeding without committing murder - that I didn’t _have_ to be that person any more.  But because of him, you’ll never have to know what that feels like… you can spend your entire life as a vampire without ever having to kill.”

Changkyun nodded.  Just talking about feeding made his thirst intensify, but Changkyun knew that he definitely didn’t want to risk the burns that sunlight would bring him.  “Can we talk about something else?  I’m so thirsty…”

Hoseok smiled, shaking his head.  “You’re doing better than I did, when I first woke up,” he replied.  “But I suppose that having an understanding of what’s happening and being away from humans helps… I was on the hunt in less than a minute.”

“And Minhyuk?” Changkyun asked.

“Minhyuk was unlucky… we were living in a boarding house at the time.  I had to sneak him out of the country for a few years afterwards,” Hoseok replied, shaking his head.  “He didn’t want to hurt anyone, but he ended up killing another tenant before I could stop him…”

Changkyun felt nauseated at the thought, even though he wasn’t sure that he could _actually_ get sick in his current state.  “He must have felt awful…” Changkyun began.

“He cried for days, once he was able to think properly,” Hoseok replied, squeezing Changkyun’s hand.  “It’s better that you’re here, far away from any of the neighbors so that you can’t smell their blood… but the first time you’re around humans is going to be difficult.  Everything is going to be so different…”

“But you’ll be there to help,” Changkyun replied, watching as Hoseok smiled and nodded in response.  “I still haven’t met Minhyuk, you know… or any other friends you may have besides Kihyun- _hyung_.”

“You met Hyungwon…” Hoseok began.

Changkyun shook his head.  “And I immediately ran away to puke my guts out because I was freaked out by the blood in the fridge… that doesn’t count.  Speaking of which, _please_ tell me it’s been ten minutes, because I’m so thirsty I think I might die.  Again.”

Hoseok’s laughter made Changkyun smile, even though he had only been partially kidding about feeling like he might die.  But Hoseok was quick to help him up off the bed.  “We should be safe now… but stick with me as we go, just in case.”  Changkyun nodded, letting the man put an arm around his shoulders and lead him into the kitchen.  

Changkyun stayed back a bit as Hoseok opened the drawer in the fridge that contained his blood stash, still a little hesitant about seeing the packs of blood despite the fact that he knew he was about to drink at least a couple of them himself.  The unpleasant memory of getting sick the first time was still here, making him uneasy.  “The taste is a little different, depending on the type.  But all that matters right now is that you feed - you won’t die from not eating, but the thirst might drive you insane,” Hoseok explained, as he pulled out three of the packs and tossed them onto the counter next to Changkyun.  “Do you want a glass, or are you okay with drinking it from the pack?”

“Cup, please,” Changkyun replied.  He could _smell_ the blood through the plastic packaging, but he held himself back from immediately ripping into it for fear of spilling the precious liquid.  The last thing he wanted was to waste any of it.  So he waited for Hoseok to grab a glass from the cabinet and open the first of the three and emptying its contents before passing it to Changkyun.

The red fluid looked strange in the glass; it was significantly darker than tomato juice, but too opaque to be confused with wine.  There really wasn’t any way of sugarcoating the fact that he was going to consume human blood.

It only took Changkyun a moment to get over the idea, picking up the glass and trying to drink it down as quickly as possible.  The liquid was slightly sweet, almost like the juice from a piece of fruit - a very thick, heavy kind of juice.  But it was delicious, and Changkyun could hardly control himself as he waited for Hoseok to refill the glass when he was done with the first.  “It’s sweet…”

“Negative types tend to be; positives have a bit more of a salty or savory flavor,” Hoseok replied.  Changkyun nodded, even though he really didn’t care at that moment; he just needed the older vampire to hurry and refill the glass in a way that wouldn’t waste any of the delicious liquid so that he could try to satiate himself and get rid of the thirst that had been bothering him since he’d woken up.  He was thankful when the man passed the glass back to him, which Changkyun was quick to drain again.  “Don’t drink too quickly… you don’t want to overfill your stomach.”

“What would happen?” Changkyun asked, stopping himself mid-glass and licking the excess from his lips.

“Your body works differently now… you don’t have the gag reflex, or the ability to vomit if you eat too much or if something doesn’t agree with you.  You don’t really _need_ either of those things as a vampire, because you don’t have to breathe and you aren’t susceptible to human infections.  But if you eat too much at one time, it can be pretty miserable…”

Changkyun nodded, before moving closer and pressing a soft kiss against the older vampire’s lips.  “Thank you, _hyung_ ,” he said, before leaning back against the counter again.

“What for?”

“For saving me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm calling this one done.
> 
> Honestly, I know that some of you really loved this, but it was like pulling teeth to write these last few chapters. I don't think I'm going to do vampires again... but I am working on a sequel for the a/b/o verse story I posted a few months back (along with like six other things...). So we'll see what gets posted next...


End file.
